Inner Dialog

Inner Dialogue

 Hola,

Mom says you had questions about this. Fascinating topic.

It makes me think of a few things.

The "writer" voice that many of us try to develop is usually close to our own. We have a style, our grammar, syntax, thought patterns, themes, perhaps tropes, which are unique to us. In fiction we create other voices, other characters outside of our own, but they all reflect voices from within. All that come from one subject is intrinsic to that person. Meaning, we all create our own versions of our thoughts, albeit with different personas.

Some people believe that all of us are subsumed into one collective consciousness. That we all amass to share one great, collective thought process, or that all of us are connected through our minds, brains, souls. Social media makes us more connected than ever before. It is interesting to see the vitriol and hyperbole that takes place there. In some ways it is like one person who simply is at constant debate and dispute with himself/herself.

Some who believe in the omniscient God, or others who posit confidence and creed in multiple deities, believe in knowledge that is cabal, complete, known, determined. We the little ones, the creations and followers, acolytes, simply need to fill in the gaps and then we will know all that there is to know. To be like God or the gods.

Others, more empirical or cynical, or some would argue pragmatic and realistic (subjective notion, in my opinion), believe that life and existence are more random, arbitrary, that there is no overarching plan or rhyme to the universe or of why we exist.

To each his/her own. 

I tend to identify with the former, that there is reason and purpose behind things. Big things, even little things. Little things could be explained easily by known science: chemistry, physics, biology. Simple enough. Bigger things get murkier, more ambiguous, more opaque, more debatable. Harder to know teleology.

So yeah, it is settled that none of it is settled. A lot of freedom to believe many things.

Back to the inner dialogue. I consider all these things, and I go with what lines up and feels right. I am optimistic, and I hope for good things that result as a consequence of our best efforts. I am hopeful for the triumph of good and love.

I like to write and blog, and I know that my voice has been consistent all my life. I think that that pattern will continue. I enjoy but I am also embarrassed by some past writings, in my journals and blogs, letters, and scraps and recordings long forgotten. Or the readings that we accumulate. Good, bad, and ugly.

It is all a part of me, you, us.

So, I think that those things are parts of my inner-dialogue, and I feel like it is a part of everyone else's. But we all have different agendas and attitudes. We are all separate and autonomous in so many ways, but in the end, we may not be as separate as some would like to think.

If God is our uniting parent, along with a mother, then we are not too far apart from one another as some might claim.

And, I think that we all have competing voices for our thoughts. That is utterly natural.

One more thing. Me being LDS, I definitely have an inner dialogue with personas like Nephi and Book of Mormon prophets, and modern ones, like Joseph Smith, Brigham Young, etc. Whether fiction or real, their prophesies and beliefs, their thoughts and aspirations, they have a place along my thoughts and voices, whether I accept them or not.

Some people figure that the voices of their childhood, that beliefs and other thoughts projected on them as youth or later, are to be detached and disregarded. That we have to find our "own" voice. Sure, we have to know our own voice. But do we have to eliminate the other voices to "have" our own? I think not. I think that all the voices combine and grow together. Our growing voice becomes better and richer.

I think that all the things are there in me, along with thoughts and voices of my mom, now passed, my adopted grandma Ruby, now in my past, and many other people who have moved on, some of them being those in books and shows that I have never met in person, are part of me. Those voices can daily or occasionally bear on my inner dialogue.

Does that clear things up? Sure.

--Dad

and other appellations- 3 November 2022