Waking Up

     I woke up and remembered who I was; but I could not recall when I was. I was me, the same me that I had been...  But for how long?

     I woke up in a nice little bungalow, not far from a beach. It was warm, it had to be morning, if felt like, but the time of day was deceptive because there was a cloud cover so even though I knew the sun was up, it was day, but it was hard to tell if the sun had risen recently or if it had been daylight for some time.

    So me, assessing the situation; I do not remember or could not tell when it was, or when I was. I was me, of course. Of course. But the confusing thing was remembering who else was around, which would determine the time: was my dad or my mom or older sisters going to come out to the veranda and call me Eddie, as I always was as a kid? Was I on a nice vacation to Florida, or Texas, or even the Caribbean? Or, was my wife going to bring out a plate of food and call me Ed or mi amor, or were my kids going to scream around the corner yelling at each other and accuse,"Dad, he is bothering me! Make him stop!"

Wait: did I have grandchildren? What was this? How could I be so lost? I was me, right? I know who I am! But when was I? Had I dreamed that I was married with kids, or that my own kids had married and had kids? Or was I a young kid again, and I had had a long night of dreaming up the whole future? Didn't I learn Spanish and leaned to talk and listen in it? I did serve a church mission for two years, or was that all dreamed up? 

I can think in Spanish, right? Claro que si. ?Como no? !Que va! That is an expression from Spain. I did go to Spain, right? I had to . I have enough memories of being there for three weeks. And South America for many months, multiple areas and friends and acquaintances. Right?

Or has it all been a dream? 

I am married, right? I have children? Of course! I have distinct memories of the four hospitals where they were born.

Who will greet me from around the corner? When am I? Where am I? What beach is out there? Is this California? North Carolina? Is it summer? Or winter in the Caribbean?

A small woman came out from behind me; she was quiet but I noticed her movement. She was dressed in a maid or nurse outfit, she had a matching head covering, and she was carrying a tray.

She said something that might have been English but I did not understand. It sounded like "Choo gunna be offa da way, sah?" I think it was a question. She had a soft voice, too, which also made it hard to take in and understand. It would have helped to know how old I was, what languages I had known and attempted learning. Had I studied years of Arabic or was I still in middle school?

"I'm sorry, ma'am. Pardon?"

She looked at me quizzically, and then set down the tray on a patio table, removed two glasses, and then went away muttering with a bow.

Well, that makes little sense to me.

What was going on?

And then I woke up. It was dark. I saw things that I knew.

And then I knew. Oh, yeah. July 2020. The longest month in the history of all months. People dying and walking around in masks.

Plenty of sleep to go around.

Plenty of time, plenty of all those things.

And, no matter how much I try, they do not consider me woke.

I am awake. And I remember when it is.

It's now, just like it was 50 years ago. Like it will be another 50 years.

See you then.