Talking to Mom

      Talking to Mom

     I lived long enough to know what it is like to talk my mom. I spoke with her over four decades. She had serious cancer in her 70s, fought it, and passed away. That was three and half years ago. I was in my forties then. (Still am; now mid-forties). My youngest children didn't get to know her much, and my older ones as well, the more I think about it.

A mother like many others. And a grandmother. An aunt. A friend to many.

Ruth Muriel Carpenter, formerly Ruth Clinch until 1985, formerly Ruth McWilliams until 1965.

People change names over times, especially women. A lady like many others.

But for reasons intrinsic to humanity, she was my lady. My mom.

I spoke with her in my thoughts:

"Hi,  Mom! How have you been?"

"Good! I have missed you and the children, my grandchildren, but they are doing okay. I see that. I have been working with some in my area that are in need of attention, and that makes me happy."

"Wow! Where are they from?"

"All over. But the ones assigned to me have special meaning to what I have experienced. Many children, but some old timers, too, many from New England. And then I visit with the people of Togo. I have had to learn more French, for sure, and I learn some of their tribal language words. Some much closer to Adamic, it has stayed closer to God's language. And then I cross over to those from Sierra Leone. I learn more about their foods and their tastes, things familiar and prized by them. We cook all sorts of goodies. And no one is so sick like I saw in my time in West Africa. The heavens are well organized and sensible."

"Do you see your family that has passed on?"

"Sure, we have plenty of time to visit. They take notes on the living, that is for sure. People do or do not believe in God while they are alive, but many fail to realize that like the hymn says, "angels are silent, notes taking". That is so true! God is the ultimate authority, but there are a lot of people involved in the whole system of God. Hard to track how many. And the things that we do or say are defended or prosecuted like in a court. But it is not patterned after how US courts or tribunals are. It is much more personal. I have been a witness on many boards. It usually involves a lot of laughter and some tears. And we always eat really well during and after. And they can last a while... But there are always more to do."

"Do people benefit from these sessions like therapy or classes?"

"Yes, you could say that, but it is so enriching to see things from a better point of view. The human mind is capable of understanding these things, but unfortunately people get wrapped up in their personal cares, some which are very necessary like food and health, shelter and safety. Others who have all those things get distracted by selfish pleasures or even destructive ones. We are all kids who must obey our parents, in the end."

"How are your parents?"

"They are well. Very funny couple. I never realized how much they contributed to their surroundings. They are well respected for their love and dedication. They are gifted and doing a lot of work. My siblings and I were blessed to have been raised by them. You and your posterity are certainly blessed through them and their ancestors."

"Wow, life sounds good."

"It is. My brain works better: French is very common sense. Khmer is too, as well as Bahasa. I am on my tenth language, counting the local dialects like Mende and Temne. English is a fine way to communicate, but I have found out that these other human tongues are very key to knowing how the whole human family lives and prospers. Learning jokes in these different cultures is so fun! And French goes every where, like to the Indian and Pacific Oceans, places I could not visit as much. And the work there is very pressing, as always."

"What is the work, exactly?"

"You know it. Start with Genesis and go from there. There are some Indian and Chinese, even some Toltec and Mayan writings that explain it. Us humans were not too far off as we wrote our histories and affairs. But certain people know the program better than others. Pay attention to them."

"Which ones are the most important?"

"That's for you to figure out, I am not at liberty to say, for you."

"Do you miss talking to your closest loved ones?"

"Of course, but I have access to many files, and I review some of those. And I keep meeting others that have things that I need to see and experience. Lots of extended family. The movies produced here are so amazing. It would put most filmmakers to shame. A lot of the content of the films made on earth is more like garbage and waste than anything truly artistic. Of course, there are beautiful exceptions. I wish the film boards could get more of those right. C'est la vie."

"Have you met anyone that has truly surprised you?"

"Oh, yes. Some of the so-called "great ones" tend to be somewhat simple and even narrow minded. Some have a hard time accepting the truth. So we work with them, sometimes more. But many others who were never renowned help the more famous ones a lot."

"Well, I have got to go. Sorry, Mom, I am not sure how I found you or you me, and I have been informed this conversation is enough for now. I love you, you know that. I miss you, but I see your personality and charm in others, and that brightens my day."

"Yes, Eddie, that is what life is about: find the good in others, see the similarities and patterns of what is worthwhile, and keep sharing it. Enjoy it! Every minute provides treasures and joys. And it does not end. It keeps building. Things are how they should be, you simply have to accept it and live it."

"Thanks, Mom. I am glad we had this talk. I am not sure I will remember it. Like words and songs you shared with me when I was baby."

"That's okay, your soul is a great recorder, and all the input is saved. The bad stuff can be expunged and filtered for purity, but the good conversations and messages of love are always there. Like God, our Father, like His Son, like your family. We're forever, and we only move on. I have to go, too, but we'll talk again sooner than you think."

"Love you."

"Love you too, Eddie Bear. Be nice to people."

"I will, Mom. Thanks for showing all your kindness."

"My pleasure. It's the best thing there is. We only give back what we receive. I have been incredibly blessed. We simply continue doing that. Life is good."

"Yep, it is. I will try to tell others that."

"Of course you will. That's why you are who you are. That's why we were assigned to where we went. It all fits, like the planets in our solar system. All our lives make sense if we choose to see how it all fits. And it is huge and small at the same time. It's perfect. I'm not sure if Mark Twain lost his mind, but he definitely lost a lot of his hope due to personal losses. Don't let that happen to you. He has told me that he needed a re-boot, and he is happy that occurred, but he wants others to look past the tragedies. Reach for the hope. Okay, that's all! You know I am thinking of my guardian angel grandchildren! They are great! Au revoir!"

A mother and grandmother like many others.

But we all have our own to know and cherish.

Hold on to yours.

Be grateful she held you.

Hold on to love. Memories, conversations, shared and passed on.

BYU Football Blanked: Fans are Chagrined

BYU Football Blanked: Fans are Chagrined, Cultural Implications

Ach, nein! The BYU Cougar football team, in the second year of Coach Kilani Sitake, in the beginning month September of 2017 in the Superdome of New Orleans, in the second game of the season, are blanked for only the third time this century. It has happened now once each to the last three coaches of this Church school, which expects a lot from its team and players. And coaches.

    Prior to being held to 0 in 2003 against arch-rival Utah at the end of an ill-fated season, and under the then ill-fated Coach Gary Crowton, Brigham Young University had held the NCAA record for consecutive games without being blanked, which had gone on for decades, since 1975, and it happened versus Arizona State. That auspicious streak had run for 28 years! Not bad. And possibly still the best ever this far into the 21st century. But this is a new era since Coach Edwards stepped down in 2000.

   BYU was again held to no points in 2015 against Michigan, which turned out to be the last year of a decent tenure of Bronco Mendenhall, he who succeeded a less than successful Crowton.  

   And now enter Sitake. Can BYU push another 26 year scoring streak, which would would push out to 2043 or so? Time will tell.

   For now, the here-to-fore optimistic Cougars must lick their wounds and get ready for another formidable opponent in Utah next Saturday.  BYU has to figure out how to move the chains and score some points. Perhaps it will not win, which is one concern,like they have lost to the Utes the last five years in a row, but they have to show up on offense. Win or lose, they must score.

   No matter the score at the end, the Cougars score points. And they are a respectable school for football, coast to coast, in general competition and winning as a program. They win most of their games consistently. They go to bowl games every year. They are successful, and this is an imprimatur since the mid-1970s of the legendary Lavell Edwards, the coach who put Provo on the college football map.

   Having grown up as a part of the Latter-day Saint community in the Mid-West, where many people are not sure who or what Mormons are, the BYU football team represented our faith with some degree of respectability and pride. Winning the national championship in 1984 certainly was a big deal, not just on a sports level, but showing that a smaller state, a smaller religion, could rise to the level of power and influence and be something, be the best. Some might say that this bespeaks the greatness of the United States, and also as a new American religion attempting to be legitimate along  other Christian faiths, perhaps this was the bellwether moment of the Church of Jesus Christ's "arrival".

Through an all-American and heralded sport such as football, the Church proved that it belongs, and this by the 1980s. This is a new relatively small faith. It showed, to a certain degree, at least psychologically for many Mormons and non-members, that the LDS Church is a partner and presence to be reckoned with.
In the years since, the team has never achieved such a height as that 1984 renown, but its power has been displayed decade after decade. And it had that scoring streak as part of the proof. 

BYU may not always win all its games, but it plays with the best and it scores points.

And to a few of us, the cultural implication, like a good Catholic who supports Notre Dame, our faith is bolstered by the impressive exploits of the team. The faith in our faith remains higher because of a sport with a pig-skin, and its reputation of formidability.

So, when the team fails to score (as Saturday's final against Louisiana State 27-0 pitifully ended), and the team that since the late 1970s plays anybody, anywhere, showing it is as good as Notre Dame, or certainly Texas Christian or Baylor, capable of competing against and AND beating the best of the college world, a few of us fans and members of our faith take it as a psychological blow.

Doubts, although logically improbable, start to seep in.

Maybe our team is not as good as we thought we were? Check.

Maybe BYU as a football and even academic institution is not as good as we thought, or hoped? Check.

Maybe all those criticisms and jokes about Latter-day Saints and their culture and practices have more truth than we would like to admit? Check.

Maybe believing in modern day prophets and scripture besides the Bible is far fetched, and simply wishful or even delusional thinking? Check.

Maybe even the Bible itself, and the mission of the Son of God, and all the hopes and missions of all Christian and other religious holy people over the millenia is based in wishful thinking, that has no greater benefit to it? Uh, check.

Maybe the world is only what we see? Empirical truthes are all we can trust in? There is no supernatural power beyond ourselves? Well, check.

And all this, to me and maybe a few others, because Tanner Mangum and his running backs and receivers and tight ends could not get near the LSU endzone.

Football and BYU team fans have to watch themselves in such trying times on this existential slippery slope of confusion and despair.

Be careful, Cougar fans. There is next game. And we will score. We may not beat Utah for the first time in my youngest child's lifetime, but BYU will move the ball. And fine the endzone.

I have hope and faith. Check.

We are, after all, who we thought we were.

We are: the Brigham Young University Cougars.

We are coming for your team next. 

Best of luck next time, LSU Tigers. We will be back, hopefully with no historic hurricane involved.

And your defense better be ready.

Check.